Be willing and able to see the warning signals that he is not the right one for you. Yes, it hurts but in the long run this saves you a lot of time and even more pain and sorrow.
When you are in love or in the middle of a relationship, it can be difficult to see the warning signals that are always there.
Try to be aware though so you can recognize these 6 hints in an early stage and move away from a hopeless situation.
He compares you to other women
When he compares you to Julia Roberts and concludes that you are way prettier, cuter, smarter, etc. then by all means stick with this guy.
On the other hand, a clear warning signal is when he talks about other women in terms of ‘we clicked right away’ or ‘she graduated cum laude’ without saying anything nice about you.
What’s ‘normal’ is when he notices a bit too many ‘killer bodies’ and then denies that he’s watching when you confront him with this.
Still I would dump a jerk like this, I mean, go watch killer bodies when you’re not with me or at least don’t lie about it.
Someone who loves you will always try his best to make you feel better about yourself, instead of mocking you.
Truth is an elastic term for him
If there is one type that makes me run as fast as possible, it’s the lying type. Sure, they’re mostly good at lying so you won’t unmask them immediately, but you can sense it when you’re dealing with a liar.
What I hate most about liars is that they rob you of a chance to make your own decisions based on the facts.
I also believe: once a liar, always a liar. This is my personal experience and after repeatedly giving ‘new’ people the benefit of the doubt – and being the victim once more – I’m done with that.
He’s not supportive of your dreams
Pay close attention to how he responds when you tell him about the dreams you have.
Does he respond enthusiastic and start to brainstorm along with you? Or does he warn you, remind you of ‘who you are’ (?) and ask you if you already have a business plan in place?
There are plenty of people out there who can manage to crush your dreams in seconds, your boyfriend should not be one of them.
You value different things
Opposites attract may sound romantic but in practice it just doesn’t work. When you like to read a book and he likes to watch movies without headphones, one of you has a problem (yes, you).
Even worse is when you value honesty and he thinks truth is something that is up for interpretation.
Be honest with yourself and you will sense it when something is off. Basic differences will always provide problems.
Your instinct tells you it’s wrong
This is the best signal there is, and stupidly enough it is also the one least trusted.
We humans have a tendency to try to ‘make it work’, rationalize things, and ban our gut feelings because they ‘don’t make sense’.
However, beware of not taking your gut feeling into account. I’ve given this a try a few times and always had to conclude I was right all along.
Trust your instincts … when something feels off, it mostly is.
Friends and relatives don’t like him
Are you having a hard time getting your parents to like your new lover? Or do your friends don’t want to meet up when he comes along?
These are clear warning signals something might be wrong here. Friends and family know you best and – as annoying as this sometimes may be – know best what’s best for you.
Booty calls etc are not even discussed in this article since these are obvious signs to run as fast as you can.
Long term goals are the way to go, and so when you are looking for a long term relationship, take advantage of recognizing the warning signals.